Lord have mercy,Christ have mercy,
Lord have mercy on me.
Lord have mercy,
Christ have mercy,
Lord have mercy on us.
I think this was written by Michael W. Smith
Sunday, January 24, 2010
On Me, On Us
Monday, January 18, 2010
Ava-tarred
I loved this not just because he expressed effectively and concisely what many others have said but also because his writing made me laugh:
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/08/opinion/08brooks.html
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/08/opinion/08brooks.html
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Beloved
This is probably something that if you know me you have heard me talk about a thousand times ... but nonetheless, for a recent Grad School app I had to write about how a theologian's view on a particular passage of scripture had affected my understanding of it. I thought it would make sense to write about something that was quite important for me! I think the footnotes are lost in the blog transfer, but almost all quotes are the Nouwen book.
Often, I believe, this statement is tacitly accepted as a fundamental motivation for success for any and all individuals no matter their beliefs about God or spirituality. In fact it sometimes seems that these few words are all that the world ever tells us. In the conversations in our churches, there are times that this belief seeps into our words to each other without us being conscious of it. We feel like ministry needs to succeed on our own terms. After all, if there are no visible outcomes then how can God be glorified? Outside of the arena of the church, this love equation dominates our every action. We have an insatiable desire for fulfillment through perceived love of everything created; we begin to forget the creator.
One begins to wonder how Jesus dealt with the above questions and issues as a human. The first answer, I believe is: very well. Why? Jesus was continually and firmly grounded in the reality of His Father’s love, as well as grounded in His Father. At the onset of his ministry, God the Father spoke plainly.
“Now when all the people were baptized, Jesus was also baptized, and while He was praying, heaven was opened, and the Holy Spirit descended upon Him in bodily form like a dove, and a voice came out of heaven, ‘You are My beloved Son, in You I am well-pleased.’” Luke 3:21-22
Henri Nouwen wrote an entire book to his dear friend based on those words. He believed that the phrase “’You are My Beloved’ revealed the most intimate truth about all human beings.” The writings and thoughts that surround this claim have formed much of my understanding not just about the passage detailing Jesus’ baptism, but also about life, love, and relationship to God. What Nouwen says has implications for our understanding of the biblical text, for communication with our soul, and for our existence within culture.
Firstly, I can speak to how Nouwen’s approach has influenced my own understanding and interpretation of the text of the Bible, including ways to read all of scripture as well as just simply this passage. In the book, Nouwen is writing to his friend who does not have a faith of his own. Immediately after the introduction of the passage above, he says plainly, “Fred, all I want to say to you is ‘You are the Beloved.’” For his friend, unfamiliar with the Bible and biblical interpretation – couldn’t this seem like an odd conclusion? God was clearly speaking to his Son Jesus, and told Him he was beloved but Nouwen seems to extend this to Fred as well. I believe this speaks to Nouwen’s understanding and interpretation of text here. He connects multiple truths. We, as humans, are in fact all God’s children (Romans 8:16). Furthermore, the entire story of continuing redemption presented both in the Old Testament and again in the New Testament and our current experience reflects God’s immeasurable love for us. This love is the reason Jesus was here with us (John 3:16). Nouwen uses these truths to extend what God the Father says to Jesus to what he says to Fred.
In this way he teaches me not only the truth of what he is saying, but also informs an understanding of interpretation of biblical text. We must be diligent, careful and prayerful in what we conclude that God is telling us in Scripture and we must make sure to connect the truth of words themselves with the larger truths that we see throughout the narrative of scripture and through the leading of the Holy Spirit.
Even more important than what Nouwen implies for the interpretation of text through his discussion of this passage, is what he tries to show us it means for our soul. Here Nouwen speaks to how easy it is to listen to the negative voices that tell us we are despicable and lead our soul into the trap of self-rejection rather than the life of the beloved. He goes so far as to postulate that arrogance is simply ‘the other side of self-rejection’. Both are connected in that in arrogance we lift ourselves up to avoid being seen as we believe we are. He says, “Both self-rejection and arrogance pull us out of the common reality of existence and make a gentle community of people extremely difficult, if not impossible, to attain.” The idea that I am beloved by love itself is in striking contrast to the words that opened this essay. The fact that I am the beloved has infected my soul with a knowledge that is beautiful and painful all at once. It is beautiful because in many ways it forms a milestone in my soul’s journey to learning how to rest in the heart of God. Reading this book helps to move along my understanding of what St. Augustine means when he says “My soul is restless until it rests in you, O God.” Furthermore, this has led me whole-souledly into the writings of Ronald Rolheiser who is explicit in articulating the needs that all human hearts have to find a solution to their restlessness; their reach outwards for fulfillment. What this means not only for my own soul, but also the souls of my friends and communities is one of the most important questions I am currently seeking to answer. This is exactly why the knowledge is also painful. Nouwen even notes that understanding that there is a voice which tells we are beloved, makes us long for a greater and fuller experience of it. It is, I believe, the right direction to be travelling and for that I am grateful.
The idea of what this means for our soul is also exactly why my relationship to Nouwen becomes valuable. Nouwen taught as a brilliant professor at Harvard, Yale, and Notre Dame. I would think this is a rather successful way to find the voices of others telling us we are worthwhile. But it didn’t sooth his soul. Ultimately he found himself embedded in the L’Arche Daybreak community for people with intellectual disabilities in Toronto (my home city). The understanding that it is a beautiful place such as this that he began to further understand his own soul’s fulfillment in the Lord gives my own soul hope for growth in all of my, less than prestigious, situations.
Finally, the question begs itself, of what Nouwen’s interpretation of Scripture means for my understanding of culture. First I think it is valuable to note that the words quoted at the outset of this essay are in essence what our culture speaks to us. Leading us to “[hope] that some person, thing, or event will come along to give you that final feeling of inner well-being you desire?” Instead we must look at the example of how Jesus reacted to God’s simple declaration of his beloved status. Jesus owned it daily, sought after God rather than life, and ended up incarnationally affecting his own culture, and truly the culture of the entire world in a way that no one has done or ever will do. We are indeed called to nothing less. We must learn to own more and more of this truth, living incarnationally through God’s power in the Holy Spirit working through us to show our culture and community that they are beloved, and that they need not listen to any lies. Thus, Nouwen’s words lead me to the prayer that my culture would be able to seek first after God and his love rather than simply and only his creation, even as Dorothy Day once commented,
“… how much man would be capable of if his soul were strong in the love of God, if he wanted God as much as he wanted to penetrate the power and glory of God’s creation.”
I pray that knowing that I am the Lord’s beloved would lead me every day right back into his heart.
Day, Dorothy, Patricia Mitchell ed. A Radical Love. Ijamsville, Maryland: The Word Among Us Press, 2000.
Nouwen, Henri. Life of the Beloved. New York: Crossroad Publishing Company, 2002.
The New American Standard Bible. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2002.
Beloved
“Prove that you are worth something; do something relevant, spectacular, or powerful, and then you will earn the love you so desire.”Often, I believe, this statement is tacitly accepted as a fundamental motivation for success for any and all individuals no matter their beliefs about God or spirituality. In fact it sometimes seems that these few words are all that the world ever tells us. In the conversations in our churches, there are times that this belief seeps into our words to each other without us being conscious of it. We feel like ministry needs to succeed on our own terms. After all, if there are no visible outcomes then how can God be glorified? Outside of the arena of the church, this love equation dominates our every action. We have an insatiable desire for fulfillment through perceived love of everything created; we begin to forget the creator.
One begins to wonder how Jesus dealt with the above questions and issues as a human. The first answer, I believe is: very well. Why? Jesus was continually and firmly grounded in the reality of His Father’s love, as well as grounded in His Father. At the onset of his ministry, God the Father spoke plainly.
“Now when all the people were baptized, Jesus was also baptized, and while He was praying, heaven was opened, and the Holy Spirit descended upon Him in bodily form like a dove, and a voice came out of heaven, ‘You are My beloved Son, in You I am well-pleased.’” Luke 3:21-22
Henri Nouwen wrote an entire book to his dear friend based on those words. He believed that the phrase “’You are My Beloved’ revealed the most intimate truth about all human beings.” The writings and thoughts that surround this claim have formed much of my understanding not just about the passage detailing Jesus’ baptism, but also about life, love, and relationship to God. What Nouwen says has implications for our understanding of the biblical text, for communication with our soul, and for our existence within culture.
Firstly, I can speak to how Nouwen’s approach has influenced my own understanding and interpretation of the text of the Bible, including ways to read all of scripture as well as just simply this passage. In the book, Nouwen is writing to his friend who does not have a faith of his own. Immediately after the introduction of the passage above, he says plainly, “Fred, all I want to say to you is ‘You are the Beloved.’” For his friend, unfamiliar with the Bible and biblical interpretation – couldn’t this seem like an odd conclusion? God was clearly speaking to his Son Jesus, and told Him he was beloved but Nouwen seems to extend this to Fred as well. I believe this speaks to Nouwen’s understanding and interpretation of text here. He connects multiple truths. We, as humans, are in fact all God’s children (Romans 8:16). Furthermore, the entire story of continuing redemption presented both in the Old Testament and again in the New Testament and our current experience reflects God’s immeasurable love for us. This love is the reason Jesus was here with us (John 3:16). Nouwen uses these truths to extend what God the Father says to Jesus to what he says to Fred.
In this way he teaches me not only the truth of what he is saying, but also informs an understanding of interpretation of biblical text. We must be diligent, careful and prayerful in what we conclude that God is telling us in Scripture and we must make sure to connect the truth of words themselves with the larger truths that we see throughout the narrative of scripture and through the leading of the Holy Spirit.
Even more important than what Nouwen implies for the interpretation of text through his discussion of this passage, is what he tries to show us it means for our soul. Here Nouwen speaks to how easy it is to listen to the negative voices that tell us we are despicable and lead our soul into the trap of self-rejection rather than the life of the beloved. He goes so far as to postulate that arrogance is simply ‘the other side of self-rejection’. Both are connected in that in arrogance we lift ourselves up to avoid being seen as we believe we are. He says, “Both self-rejection and arrogance pull us out of the common reality of existence and make a gentle community of people extremely difficult, if not impossible, to attain.” The idea that I am beloved by love itself is in striking contrast to the words that opened this essay. The fact that I am the beloved has infected my soul with a knowledge that is beautiful and painful all at once. It is beautiful because in many ways it forms a milestone in my soul’s journey to learning how to rest in the heart of God. Reading this book helps to move along my understanding of what St. Augustine means when he says “My soul is restless until it rests in you, O God.” Furthermore, this has led me whole-souledly into the writings of Ronald Rolheiser who is explicit in articulating the needs that all human hearts have to find a solution to their restlessness; their reach outwards for fulfillment. What this means not only for my own soul, but also the souls of my friends and communities is one of the most important questions I am currently seeking to answer. This is exactly why the knowledge is also painful. Nouwen even notes that understanding that there is a voice which tells we are beloved, makes us long for a greater and fuller experience of it. It is, I believe, the right direction to be travelling and for that I am grateful.
The idea of what this means for our soul is also exactly why my relationship to Nouwen becomes valuable. Nouwen taught as a brilliant professor at Harvard, Yale, and Notre Dame. I would think this is a rather successful way to find the voices of others telling us we are worthwhile. But it didn’t sooth his soul. Ultimately he found himself embedded in the L’Arche Daybreak community for people with intellectual disabilities in Toronto (my home city). The understanding that it is a beautiful place such as this that he began to further understand his own soul’s fulfillment in the Lord gives my own soul hope for growth in all of my, less than prestigious, situations.
Finally, the question begs itself, of what Nouwen’s interpretation of Scripture means for my understanding of culture. First I think it is valuable to note that the words quoted at the outset of this essay are in essence what our culture speaks to us. Leading us to “[hope] that some person, thing, or event will come along to give you that final feeling of inner well-being you desire?” Instead we must look at the example of how Jesus reacted to God’s simple declaration of his beloved status. Jesus owned it daily, sought after God rather than life, and ended up incarnationally affecting his own culture, and truly the culture of the entire world in a way that no one has done or ever will do. We are indeed called to nothing less. We must learn to own more and more of this truth, living incarnationally through God’s power in the Holy Spirit working through us to show our culture and community that they are beloved, and that they need not listen to any lies. Thus, Nouwen’s words lead me to the prayer that my culture would be able to seek first after God and his love rather than simply and only his creation, even as Dorothy Day once commented,
“… how much man would be capable of if his soul were strong in the love of God, if he wanted God as much as he wanted to penetrate the power and glory of God’s creation.”
I pray that knowing that I am the Lord’s beloved would lead me every day right back into his heart.
Works Cited
Day, Dorothy, Patricia Mitchell ed. A Radical Love. Ijamsville, Maryland: The Word Among Us Press, 2000.
Nouwen, Henri. Life of the Beloved. New York: Crossroad Publishing Company, 2002.
The New American Standard Bible. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2002.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
In Your Hands*
... to follow-up on further thoughts from the last post over a holiday which has had a greater than normal amount of reflection time.
I think what I love most, or at least find most valuable, about the 'secret of life,' as cheesily coined below, is the change in focus, and that it is so darned applicable in most every situation.
One could be sick over Christmas break and wrenching his guts out and really start to pity himself. But that same person could have that statement posed to them?
Furthermore, it is possible that this line of thinking reminds one, surprisingly enough, that it really is about God. So if you are in a particular in-action/action which seems rather dull but is the action/in-action which glorifies God - than that is more than what you could ask for to experience in that phase of your life. As such, it really is the most fulfilling thing one could do.
The trick for me is seeking out those actions, in-actions, attitudes and places which glorify God, of which there are many available. [Edit 10 minutes later: Or in fact, simply just embracing them when they are given to me. My language in this last paragraph originally showed that I learned nothing. In fact that whole thing about glorifying God while being bedridden is about embracing the in-action as something just as fulfilling. There is a time for seeking and a time for embracing]
*title credit goes to my man Charlie Winston - whose album my sister was kind enough to get for me from England!
I think what I love most, or at least find most valuable, about the 'secret of life,' as cheesily coined below, is the change in focus, and that it is so darned applicable in most every situation.
One could be sick over Christmas break and wrenching his guts out and really start to pity himself. But that same person could have that statement posed to them?
Is there no way to make this worship and honour God or is there just no way to make this worship and honour your life; the life you think you should be living/ think you are totally entitled to?And therein lies the rub! The truth is that the situation can be used to honour and worship God. In fact, and it's possible that this only works for me, but thinking along those lines seems to quash the logical leverage of most restless "I don't deserve this" (read "I am unfulfilled") frustrations! It is not, unfortunately, that it causes these thoughts to flee. But thinking this way does seem to expose the selfish humanity of it all.
Furthermore, it is possible that this line of thinking reminds one, surprisingly enough, that it really is about God. So if you are in a particular in-action/action which seems rather dull but is the action/in-action which glorifies God - than that is more than what you could ask for to experience in that phase of your life. As such, it really is the most fulfilling thing one could do.
The trick for me is seeking out those actions, in-actions, attitudes and places which glorify God, of which there are many available. [Edit 10 minutes later: Or in fact, simply just embracing them when they are given to me. My language in this last paragraph originally showed that I learned nothing. In fact that whole thing about glorifying God while being bedridden is about embracing the in-action as something just as fulfilling. There is a time for seeking and a time for embracing]
*title credit goes to my man Charlie Winston - whose album my sister was kind enough to get for me from England!
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
The Secret of Basketball?
I confess, Bill Simmons and his Book of Basketball has taken over half my commuting life. Last week I was reading this part of the book...
Could it be that,
"Isiah [Thomas] smiled. I could tell he was impressed. He took a dramatic pause. You could say he even milked the moment. 'The secret of basketball,' he told me, 'is that it's not about basketball.' The secret of basketball is that it's not about basketball. That makes no sense, right? How can that possibly make sense?" pp. 39, The Book of BasketballBill goes on to discuss that there is a fundamentally important social dynamic to a basketball team; that teammates must care most about winning and about making each other better - and not about the basketball itself. But I could hardly pay attention to this ... because I had read Brother Lawrence's thoughts and opinions earlier in the morning as such:
"That in this conversation with God we are also employed in praising, adoring, and loving Him incessantly, for His infinite goodness and perfection." pp. 23It's possible that I have a particular problem with loving to find connections in these different sort of texts - but it all got me thinking on this a rare train ride home that i wasn't almost falling asleep...
"That the most excellent method he had found of going to God was that of doing our common business without any view of pleasing men, and (as far we are capable) purely for the love of God." pp. 24
"That we ought, once for all, heartily to put our whole trust in God, and make a total surrender of ourselves to Him, secure that He would not deceive us. That we ought not to be weary of doing little things for the love of God, who regards not the greatness of the work, but the love with which it is performed." pp. 24 - 25
"That the end we ought to propose to ourselves is to become, in this life, the most perfect worshipers of God we can possibly be, as we hope to be through all eternity." pp. 25, Brother Lawrence, The Practice of the Presence of God
"If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul?" Jesus, Mathew 16:24-26
Could it be that,
the Secret
of life
is that it's not about life
... it's about God?
Please bear with me for a moment, because I'm sure you're probably either thinking that that sounds rather escapist or of course that is the case and how could it take me so long to realize it.
If its the latter - than I want to honestly thank you because you have most likely beautifully influenced me to finally come to this sort of conclusion. Even with being behind in the game - i've really liked dwelling on this thought a lot recently. I'll be in the car annoyed at the car in front of me who has to travel over the speedbumps at like 2 km/h WHEN ALL I WANT TO DO IS GO HOME - and i have to laugh - because isn't that me making it too much about life? In fact - this has come up an inordinate number of times recently, and each time I guess I just have to ask forgiveness for how selfishly I care about the stupidest little things in my life - just because it's mine! In that way, I'm thankful for God revealing this thought to me - because it's been very valuable.
If you were the former - thinking that its just way too escapist to think about something other than what is present here in front of us - I don't think that's what I'm trying to say. In the same odd way that Isaiah's '89 Pistons team cared so much about winning, and getting the group together and to another level that they were the best basketball team they could be without the focus being on basketball, Jesus lived the best life a human could live with his focus entirely not on life. It isn't that He wasn't present to where He was, on the contrary, God was where He was, with Him - so his focus on God showed Him where life was and how to redeem and fulfill it!
Lord please help me to get a place more resembling Isaiah as a player than as a GM!
of life
is that it's not about life
... it's about God?
Please bear with me for a moment, because I'm sure you're probably either thinking that that sounds rather escapist or of course that is the case and how could it take me so long to realize it.
If its the latter - than I want to honestly thank you because you have most likely beautifully influenced me to finally come to this sort of conclusion. Even with being behind in the game - i've really liked dwelling on this thought a lot recently. I'll be in the car annoyed at the car in front of me who has to travel over the speedbumps at like 2 km/h WHEN ALL I WANT TO DO IS GO HOME - and i have to laugh - because isn't that me making it too much about life? In fact - this has come up an inordinate number of times recently, and each time I guess I just have to ask forgiveness for how selfishly I care about the stupidest little things in my life - just because it's mine! In that way, I'm thankful for God revealing this thought to me - because it's been very valuable.
If you were the former - thinking that its just way too escapist to think about something other than what is present here in front of us - I don't think that's what I'm trying to say. In the same odd way that Isaiah's '89 Pistons team cared so much about winning, and getting the group together and to another level that they were the best basketball team they could be without the focus being on basketball, Jesus lived the best life a human could live with his focus entirely not on life. It isn't that He wasn't present to where He was, on the contrary, God was where He was, with Him - so his focus on God showed Him where life was and how to redeem and fulfill it!
Lord please help me to get a place more resembling Isaiah as a player than as a GM!
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Work is a Gift
"Work is a gift, a vocation. Before the Fall, Adam was given the garden to cultivate. It was only after the Fall that all nature travailed and groaned so that man has to work with the sweat of his brow and combat earthquakes, floods, droughts, boll weevils, Japanese beetles, fatigue and sloth." Dorothy DayDid you see how she included fatigue and sloth in there amongst all these awesome things like boll weevils? What a truly profound thought - 'Work is a gift.' Something about this hit me right. Adam was gifted with the opportunity to work to tend and care for the garden. I don't think many people today (at least the ones I go to work with) consider the work part of their work a gift. Most are happy with the wage part though. But 'Work is a gift' isn't a philosophy that ends when we say we are thankful for a job because it can pay the bills and its hard to get a job that does so. 'Work is a gift' is to say - I am thankful that you trusted me to be a steward of something Lord - that you have filled me with talent such that I have responsibility.
I've been trying to think about whether or not work and rest are opposites. I think generally we consider them so. I desire to REST in the heart of God more than anything else. Is part of that feeling that I get imagining that the idea that the 'work' of this life will be over - that grasping and seeking work. Correct me if I am wrong, but I think the error in my thinking in that sentence is in my definition of work - or my automatic association of it to that which is longing and unfulfilled in life. I'm thinking maybe that rest isn't the opposite of work. This morning I fixed the dishwasher and leveled out the oven with my dad. I can confess that I didn't do much of the work, but I was still focused on the task and trying to help and it was incredibly restful. Work can be restful no? Rest, in the way I am thinking of it here, is more a state of the heart than a horizontal position. Does it make sense that if one considers work a gift than one can rest in the thought that someone out there thought enough of the person to bless them with it.
I think we can also turn work into a frustrating annoying thing. I had to 'work' today on an assignment that I thought was bogus and unnecessary - and it somewhat soured my rested mood from the morning. So much so that I had to try and talk less, because it was one of those situations where you could tell that your quick thoughts and words weren't rational, let alone compassionate. Was it simply the struggle with that frustrating 'work' that pushed out my rest? Maybe. Maybe it was my attitude towards it. This wasn't destructive work, and in fact it was probably training me in more ways than I thought. Could it be possible that I just didn't have the right attitude about it? This kind of seems like a big jump - but I was thinking abou this other passage of Day's and considered that maybe I was a bit short-sighted about what I had to do. If i considered that work part of the work fo the Kingdom, in that even the discipline was most likely training me, then I could see it still as a gift. The amazing opportunity God has given me to work in this life to begin to build his Kingdom. The Kingdom he will return and finish, the Earth he will renew and restore!
"There is work now. Much of our national expenditure by the government is for war, past and present. Much of this work, this labor, is not good work, constructive work, but work for preparedness, or dealing with pensions or hospitals, etc. It is not even in building homes that have been destroyed by war, let alone homes here in this country where we did not have that destruction. Slums are still with us. Many houses have been torn down, more than hvae been put up. Farms have been consolidated and produce less than if they were all small farms; soil has been depleted, national resources have been wasted. And are we to sit by and see man, and God's good earth, so ruined and degraded, and then be told, "Do not bother bout these things, seek first the kingdom of haven?" Dorothy Day
The truth is, and please let me know if you agree that this is the case, I may have romanticized the work I did today. Trying to get to some kind of a place where I can consider it a gift. But Lord-willing that will lead me towards constructive Kingdom work - where I see that the seeking of God's will intersects with work on the Earth. Another note I want to make is that I don't want to carelessly dismiss the idea of struggling through work. We often talk about 'heart work' which can involve difficult, emotional, and slow growth and change. I do not want to disregard the struggle that that involves and just say that it is all gift and rest. But I do want to throw the thought out there.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
A Love Story
This past week I saw Michael Moore's Capitalism: A Love Story. I liked it. Of course it had Moore's trademark manipulative use of emotion and people's stories and at-times-one-sided presentation of facts. But what I thought was good was the optimism and positivity that it showed. Obviously it highlighted some problems with our economic system, which were saddening and frustrating when they were laid out. But it also showed the possibility for improvement and change and gave examples of the group actions of people and what they had accomplished. It also showed what communities and the church were doing to help different groups of people who were not being treated compassionately. In fact, I thought it did this so well that it was, in a way, encouraging, and inspiring. It left me wanting to work to fight against economic injustices rather than just complain (or write on my blog) about how wrong things are.
That was pretty cool.
That was pretty cool.
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